Hotel Nowhere
by Warashi Ame
Summary: It’s been a few years since the last Dark Tournament and now the Rekai Tantei have to participate again. Enter Summer the insane American hotel clerk. Life is about to get interesting.
1. Chapter One

**Hotel Nowhere  
****Chapter One  
****By** Ame Rokugatsut

**Disclaimer:** If I owned the show Kurama would lose his shirt frequently and for no apparent reason. That and he'd be in his Youko form half the time. Yum.

**WARNINGS:** This should be for sixteen and up but not rated R. It's rated for suggestive themes.

* * *

"_Rise and shine babe! It's another beautiful day!"_

"Fuck ya," a tan hand rose from the depths of the black comforter to slam down on the alarm clock. Hopefully she didn't break it this time, replacing the damn things added up after a while.

Yawning and rubbing her eyes, Summer brushed her teeth quickly and threw on a pair of black jeans, and royal blue tank top under a half-open burgundy trench coat. She quickly ran a brush threw her shoulder length, wavy, white hair, and tossed the brush in her bag. A little smile flitted over her features as she then put on her trademark burgundy fisher's hat, tilting it so that it shadowed over one blue eye eye.

She decided to skip breakfast. She could eat on the bus if she needed to. It was time to go to work. Her boss had told her to pack enough clothes to last a month and a half, in other words all of her clothes. He had mentioned something about shipping certain staff members to a normally deserted hotel for a once a year competition. Most of the staff had not wanted to go, some of them muttering something about demons, crazies and what sounded like dark tournament.

Summer actually hadn't wanted to go because she had no one to look after her beloved pets. But the boss told her that taking the job would pay more and she could bring her pets too. Well, she needed the money so she said why not.

She already had sent her tabby cat, Ryoshi, ahead of her. Cats do not travel well. Her dog she would be bringing with her. He traveled well in buses and on boats.

Closing the door with her foot, Summer picked up her waiting duffle bag and strung her headphones around her neck, glancing around the empty house once before turning and walking out the door.

Before stopping quite abruptly.  
"MAH SHOES!"

Like a burgundy blur Summer tore back into the house and to the living room, immediately spotting one black combat boot. Hopping on one foot she searched around frantically for the other, tripping over the couch in the process.

"Here shoe, shoe, shoe-KYA!" Summer glared at the couch as her shoe was finally put on, then groaned in the hopeless search for her other. The wagging of a tail against a carpet caught her attention, and she looked up at the big German Shepard sitting in the kitchen doorway.

With _her _shoe.

"Lupin!" Summer yelled, scrambling up. "Give me that!"

As soon as he saw his mistress coming, he dashed away and, from what Summer could see, zoomed out the door.

"LUPIN! YA GET YOUR SORRY ASS BACK HERE!"

Disregarding everything Summer tore after the dog, who was running flat out down the street, tail wagging like mad. Damn, that dog could run! Summer soon found herself jumping fences, clearing garbage pails, and narrowly getting run over by a few cars in the private streets of her neighborhood. Fucking dog.

All the while yelling at the dog like an idiot.

Oh look, the bus to take her and the damn dog to the docks to catch the boat was here! Oh dear, several of the coworkers decided that she made for great entertainment. Where they doing what she thought they were? Yes, yes they were. Some of them were taking pictures damn them, oh and look! The other ones are pointing and laughing. _I'll get them for this. I'll just get Ryoshi to leave dead mouse heads in their rooms. Childish yes, but effective too._

An idea struck Summer so suddenly that it might as well have been a lightning bolt from the heavens above. She reached into her pocket. Was it there? Yes, it was. Score!

She pulled her hand back out of her pocket. "Lupin! Cookie!"

The German Shepard stopped dead in his tracks. He took a deep whiff, around the smell of the slobber covered leather shoe, he could smell it. A chocolate chip cookie. For him? Yes, she said his name. Then it was for him.

It all boiled down to one question the shoe, or the cookie? Easy choice. He dropped the shoe and tackled his mistress to the ground and grabbed the cookie from her hand, he bounced off a ways to eat his rare treat.

Summer sat up from her hard meeting with the pavement. She crawled over to the shoe, her hand reached for it. She paused, there were a pair of feet standing next to her shoe. These shoes were shiny black loafers that looked hauntingly familiar. She looked up. "Hi boss."

"Mackenzy, is that your dog?"

"Yup! This," she hauled Lupin over by the collar, "is mah dog Lupin. He's a big loveable ball of fluff."

"He's big."

Summer nodded as she dragged the munching Lupin over to the bus. "Uh-uh, he's half Geraman Shepard and half wolf. That makes him look like a _big,_ long haired, German Shepard. Don't worry though. He's a real sweetie."

"Is he dangerous?"

"Oh, calm down. Lupin is as about as dangerous as a squirrel," Summer responded, trying to pull Lupin up the bus steps with little success. Summer frowned and then with a grunt managed to pull the dog half way up the steps before he decided to help her. Well, not so much as help her, but he was done with his cookie and there were delightfully gullible humans on the bus to pet and coo over him.

He bounced up the steps and flopped onto a seat in the third row near some of the maids, who were only to happy to run their hands through the soft, fluffy fur.

Summer staggered up to steps behind him after depositing her bag in the storage compartment. Unlike her dog she wandered to the back of the bus and immediately plopped down between the identical dark haired twins. The boys smiled at her in welcome. Only years of association enabled her to tell them apart.

Yuki, the older twin, had a slightly deeper voice than Kyo the younger. While they both had blue eyes, Kyo's were a shade lighter than Yuki's. Unfortunately, unless you knew exactly what to look for you would be unable to tell them apart. Not even knowing about the eyes helped unless you saw them side by side and even then the color was hard to tell apart.

The boss walked past them and sat three rows behind them on the other side of the bus.

"I see you brought, loony, loopy, Lupin with you," Kyo commented.

"Ryoshi too," Summer said agreeably.

"Why," Yuki asked.

"'Cause I couldn't find anyone who was willing ta watch them while I'm gone." She leaned back in her seat, an arm thrown over each boys shoulder. "So boys, ya ready ta have some fun?"

"Oh, yes," said Kyo.

"Lot's of pretty boys to drool over," Yuki sighed blissfully.

The boss twitched violently.

Summer saw this out of the long corner of her eye and smirked evilly. "Now, now. Ya know better than ta make out with the pool boy-"

"What's wrong with making out with the pool boy," Kyo cried out.

"-during work hours," Summer finished.

"There is nothing wrong about lusting after the pool boy," Yuki soothed his brother.

"It did seem to bother the boss though," Kyo mentioned.

Summer smirked. "I think what bothered him is the fact _both_ of ya were making out with the pool boy at the _same_ time."

Yuki smiled innocently. "We're identical twins. Our DNA code is exactly the same which is like being one person. So technically it's not incest."

Kyo nodded happily. "Really, it's more like masturbation."

The boss shuddered. "I am not hearing this." He got up to move to the front of the bus. Only to be tossed back into his seat by the stampeding heard of workers. They looked rather green in the face.

"The windows won't open," one of the maids wheezed.

The workers all huddled in the back of the bus while the unfortunate bus driver had to make do with a gas mask. Lupin sat behind the driver with a blissful expression.

Yuki stared at the brightly smiling Summer. "What did you do? I know chocolate makes dogs fart horribly, but you only gave him a small chocolate chip cookie!"

Summer giggled evilly. "I gave him liver for diner."

* * *

Ame here! Anyways this is my next story that I'm working on until I get more reviews for my Naruto fanfic, Infinite Time. Please review, ne?

Ideas for the next chapter would be appreciated. I have several scenes all plotted out, but no full ideas. I also have a vague idea where this story is going. Before warned it is spastic.

Summer has an accent so a few words are pronounced oddly. If you aren't sure what's what here you go.

You- ya  
You'll- ya'll  
You're- ya're  
Yours- yas  
My- mah  
To- ta


	2. Chapter Two

**Hotel Nowhere  
****Chapter Two  
****By** Ame Rokugatsu

**Disclaimer:** Summer, Lupin, Ryoshi, Kyo, and Yuki are mine…oh, and the pool boy too. Otherwise I don't own it.

**WARNINGS:** This should be for sixteen and up but not rated R. It's rated for suggestive themes.

* * *

They all piled out of the bus once they reached the docks, some faster than others. Summer smiled cheerfully and ignored the looks of utter hatred. She looked around the docks and had to admit she wasn't impressed. It was grimy, dirty, dingy, and smelly. The boats weren't that much better either.

The boss walked with confidence towards on of the larger boats. "It's this one. Hurry up now. We need to be there at least two days before the contestants arrive. That ought to give you enough time to clean and get settled in."

"How long will it take for us to get there?" One of the maids questioned.

"Depending on the weather it will take anywhere from one to two days."

They all grabbed their bags and trudged up the gang plank, Summer with Lupin at her heels. Everyone went to their assigned rooms with their roommate. Summer was the exception, besides the boss, because Lupin was an exceptionally big dog.

Normally Summer would be delighted with the fact that the twins were staying so near (the room next to hers) but to her dismay the walls were rather thin and Yuki and Kyo couldn't keep their hands off each other. She decided to go on top deck until they quieted down, which didn't look like it would be happening any time soon, as she saw the pool boy going into their room as she was leaving hers. Blackmail would have been a potential answer to her problems if it wasn't for the fact that none of them cared who knew.

Summer wandered up the stairs, past the boss's room, while Lupin followed, nails clicking on the floor. After a brief struggle with the heavy door at the top of the stairs, Summer managed to push it open. Her nose was met with the tangy ocean air and crisp evening wind. The sky was the dark purple of twilight fading into a dark blue with a smattering of stars in the sky. The boat rocked gently in the mellow waves. It was rather peaceful, without the distracting moans.

She started to walk around the deck with Lupin faithfully trotting at her side. Normally she would have let him wander off, but several of the crew did not look like the type she'd want to be alone with for even a minute. If there was one thing she had learned over the course of her life it was to follow her instincts.

Then again, when Lupin wasn't acting like a stupid lab, he had quite sharp instincts as well. If Summer hadn't kept him by her side, he wouldn't have left her. Several of these men smelled of danger and other's fear and pain.

Turning a corner they came across the ship's captain. The fur on Lupin's back rose briefly before settling down. He made a soft woofing noise, the captain smelled nice. The captain smelled of old leather books and parchment, not of fear or pain.

The captain was an older gentleman with graying hair. He smiled and held his hand out for Lupin to smell. "He is friendly isn't he?"

Summer nodded. Lupin was impeccable when it came to judging character. Until she had Lupin's approval she would be cautious of him, as nice as he seemed. Lupin butted his head against the offered hand, shamelessly begging for scratches.

Lupin made a pleased noise when the captain replied. Summer relaxed and laughed lightly. "Yes, he's very friendly and absolutely shameless when it comes to being petted." She shook her head in slight amusement.

The captain chuckled. "So why are you up here instead of down below like everyone else?"

"Noisy neighbors."

The captain looked at her in confusion, but she offered no further explanation. The door to the bunks opened and two more co-workers came out. They looked at Summer and realized that even she couldn't handle them. They wandered over to make friendly conversation.

"So what's the name of the island we're goin' ta?" Summer asked the captain. "The boss didn't tell us."

"It's called Hanging Neck Island."

"How cheerful."

The four of them quickly fell into light conversation and parted company two hours later. The captain had to get back to his job and the other two wanted to go back below. Summer stopped them. "It's only been two hours, I'd give 'em another half hour. Those boys have quite a bit of stamina."

The two sighed in dismay and wandered off to walk around the deck. Summer chuckled and headed off in the opposite direction. Lupin got up from his sprawled position on the deck and quickly trotted to catch up with his mistress. They turned another corner only to have their path blocked by a rather large crewman who had a rather nasty glint in his eyes. Lupin was growling low enough that only Summer, who was next to him, could hear him. Summer got a bad feeling about this.

"Well, well, what's a pretty little thing like you doin' by yourself? Maybe lookin' for some company?" He chuckled lecherously.

Summer raised an eyebrow. "I came ta get away from the noise and ta get some fresh air. I see that I shall have ta go else where." She turned to walk away. The burly crewman grabbed her arm with the intention of dragging her into the cabin next to them. It was rarely checked on and fairly sound proof. The crewman licked his chapped lips in anticipation.

Lupin went rigid. His growl became clearly audible and his _large_ teeth visible. The fur on his back stood straight up. He crouched. Summer's robin egg blue eyes narrowed, that was all he needed. His police dog training kicked in. He lunged for the crewman's groin. His fangs sank home. The salty sweet blood rushed into his mouth. (1)

The crewman wailed like a banshee and let go of his mistress's arm. Mission accomplished.

Summer calmly walked a few paces away. Normally she would be tempted to leave Lupin alone with the crewman, but she didn't want Lupin to be put down for "attacking" him. She stopped for a moment and gave a high pitched whistle. Lupin let go and trotted to her side. Then they walk to away to go down below, leaving the crewman writhing in agony.

They passed the captain on their way down the stairs. Summer informed him of the crewman's condition, how he ended up like that, and that she would be filing a report against the crewman. They sauntered past the captain and went back to Summer's room.

Summer flopped down on her bed and stared at the ceiling. It was fairly quite now. The only noise she heard from the twins and the pool boy were the soft purrs and murmurs of conversation of the aftermath. Much less annoying. She sighed and got back up.

She tossed her shoes across the room, hung up her coat and hat, and dug out her nightgown. Her nightgown consisted of an over sized navy t-shirt and a pair of black bicycle shorts. She brushed her teeth and crawled into bed.

Lupin hopped onto the foot of the bed and curled up. Summer smiled at him. "So what will it be tonight?" She asked reaching into her bag at the side of the bed. She dug around, blindly. She pulled out one of the books she had packed. "Ah, Stephen King. A good choice.

With a malicious smirk she propped her pillow up she was leaning against the wall, the thin wall that separated her and two of the maids that she despised. With a wicked chuckle she opened the book and began to read aloud to Lupin knowing full well that the two maids could hear her and the creepy book. The boys in the other room could hear her as well, but they liked Stephen King, not that they were paying much attention to anything but each other.

Bright and early they arrived at the island the next morning. Yuki, Kyo, and their boyfriend were pleasantly rested. The boss did not look so good as he suffered from motion sickness. Summer was surprisingly well rested and cheerful considering that she read until eleven o' clock that evening before turning in for the night. The two maids on the other side of her room had large dark circles around their eyes and looked as though they had not slept a wink, which in fact they hadn't. The rest of hotel workers were in varying states. (2)

As a group, they approached the stately hotel. It was very large and white. Unfortunately it needed at lot of work with only three days to do it. The surrounding grounds that were not part of the forest were over run with weeds, the walls on the outside were a grayish color in desperate need of a scrubbing, the inside of the building was covered in a layer of thick dust as it was only occupied once a year for a few weeks at a time. Not to mention all the windows were covered in a thick layer of grime and not only did they only have three days to make the entire hotel shine from top to bottom, they also only had those three days to clean the fighting arena and stands as well. Oh, joy.

First thing was first though, which completely overruled the boss. He wanted them to start cleaning the hotel first instead of the rooms they would be staying in. The boss only had to clean his room and his office but everyone else had to clean the rest of the hotel, maid or not. They all knew that they wouldn't have enough energy to clean their rooms that evening without collapsing in a state of exhaustion. When the boss spoke of his plan Summer summed up what they all thought of that in a few short elegant words.

"In a word, no. In two words, no, no. In three words, fuck off bitch." (3)

Summer and the twins claimed their rooms and hijacked cleaning supplies from the homophobic maids. They had their own cleaning supplies mind you, but it was so much fun to provoke them… The boss forced them to give them back when the maids suffered a nervous break down. In all honesty the terrible trio couldn't see why they had to give them back, the maids refused to touch the cleaning supplies in fear (read sheer stupidity) of homosexuality or insanity being a transferable "disease." Kyo commented that if it was transferable that wouldn't care after they got it because they would be to busy having hot lesbian sex with each other… It took a lot of begging, pleading, convincing, and some blackmail from Summer and Yuki to the boss from firing him…

Anyways they managed to get a good portion of the hotel cleaned and were planning on finishing the hotel tomorrow and then dedicate the rest of the next day to the stadium, which was going to be used the most. So it was a fairly productive day sans the occasional employee sniffing the various cleaning products and having to pry the main chef's assistant off the ceiling when he found a giant roach in the kitchen while cleaning. Summer made sure to get lots of pictures, they could come in handy later. That and the nest of mice she had found. She had moved them to a safe location outside but made a mental note of where they were.

Ryoshi, Summer's cat, had been uncrated as soon as she had landed and the cat immediately went after the boss's coffee pot. She had torn up his hand pretty well when he tried to take it away from her. Ah, yes. The hideous effects of withdrawal.

The next day with much groaning and cursing of the bright sunlight that dared to penetrate the thick curtains, Summer got up. She got dressed, had about half of her coffee before Ryoshi got to it. She attempted to put on her shoes, but Lupin made off with one of them again. Then she decided to skip shoes as she was by far more comfortable bare foot.

Quite a few hours later, almost exactly at dusk, they finally managed to get the entirety of the hotel cleaned and weeded. They all (except the lazy boss who did nothing) ate ravenously like a pack of half starved hyenas before pretty much collapsing. They got up the next day and had to speed clean the arena because the guests and the contestants would be arriving at almost exactly noon tomorrow. And yet they managed some how.

Though it might have helped that boss decided to help (read blackmailed) them clean. That night Summer and a good portion of the employees did a load of laundry to clean their casual clothes that had gotten filthy in the process of cleaning. Before going to bed Summer made sure to set out her rather unique version of her uniform. Tomorrow was going to be a very big and interesting day. As she drifted off into sleep, Lupin at the foot of the bed and Ryoshi on the pillow next to her, Summer couldn't help wondering what kind of tournament it was and what the contestants would be like. She also wondered why Yuki and Kyo kept mentioning demons. Everyone knew that demons weren't real…

* * *

Ame here. The next chapter should be up in the next few days. Mind you that I can only write this while I'm at school because my mother took away my computer so I would focus on school work. That means at home while I do have acsess to a computer and the internet it's in the office and my mom works from home so I'm sharing the office space with her and that means she can turn around anytime and well…  
I think you get the point. Anyways, please review. If you aren't a author leave your email address if you want me to contact you, ne?

(1) Police dogs are trained to go for the groin (the inner thigh) if there is no visible weapon, otherwise they aim for the arm. Dogs that are not trained to police standards go for the throat, animal instinct.

(2) Yuki and Kyo's parents taught them the value of sharing a little _too_ well…

(3) I have been known to say this on varying subjects…anyone can use it if they want.

You- ya  
You'll- ya'll  
You're- ya're  
Yours- yas  
My- mah  
To- ta

**SkitzofranicCrazyPhysco-** Yup, Summer speaks Japanese. Things would be rather, oh I don't know, _difficult_ if she couldn't. She is originally from New Orleans, Mississippi, USA. So she has a bit of an accent. I know it sounds weird, but hell, I learned Japanese when I lived in California but couldn't speak a word of Spanish.

The demons will come in the next chapter. I was going to put them here but it's getting really long and I'm a little short on ideas.

**Starfall88-** Yes, squirrels are evil. However I find them to be more annoying than dangerous. Thanks for reviewing this story as well as my other ones. I can also help you not make a Harry Potter Mary Sue if you like. I have a bit more time these days, but not much.

**LaBOBuren-** My Yuki and Kyo are nothing like the ones from Fruits Basket, but it would be quite interesting if those two couldn't keep their hands to themselves as well, ne? …Yum…No, no, no! Bad Hentai!


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